::I DON'T THINK I'M READY FOR THAT JELLY::
A pre-teen girl outside my office is wearing a pair of pants that read "CUTE" across the butt.
I will never -- I repeat,
never -- wear any garment with words emblazoned across its ass portion. Nor will I allow my children.
Unless, maybe, it's something divinely self-referential, like "READ THIS, MY ASS!" or "GLUTEUS MAXIMI." And still, never for kids.